Angelina and her mom, Marcheline Bertrand, out with a then-infant Maddox on 6/12/02Angelina Jolie lost her mother nearly two years ago but doesn’t seem to have let herself take the time to really work through that grieving process. She’s not unique in trying to deal with tragedy and difficult feelings by staying busy and focusing on other people, it’s common. Unfortunately, dealing with loss this way often makes finding closure a much longer journey. Jolie’s superwoman image cracked a little recently when she was talking about how her mother influenced how she played her character in The Changeling.

She has to keep it together for the sake of her kids, but she is only human and falls apart from time to time,” a longtime friend of Angelina tells OK!. “She is still a mess over Marcheline’s departure, believing no one understands her the way her mother did. They had a very strong bond that she feels she will never have with another person.”

Throughout her grief, Angelina has been able to rely on her family. Her partner Brad Pitt has especially helped her get through the dark times. “Brad has been her rock, and he will always be there for her,” the friend tells OK!. “Without his love, she would never have been able to cope.”

Angelina also has drawn strength from her children, Maddox, Pax, Zahara, Shiloh and 4-month-old twins Knox and Vivienne, whose middle name honors Marcheline.

“Mad tries to cheer her up and makes her laugh and smile,” reveals her friend. “She feels like she is the most privileged woman to have such an incredible family and has said her mother is a guardian angel over her household.”

Grieving the loss of a loved one is a process with many steps and no determinate amount of time to get through it. When the loved one is a parent that was very close, the process is even more intense and there is a real need to take the time to work through it, no matter how strong or together you are. This means taking time for yourself, dealing with the loss, your feelings, and how you’re going to go on with your life without one of the most important people in it. Most of us have or will go through this, and all of us with a heart support people who are living through the devastation of losing someone so close.

It was a little disturbing to hear people malign Jolie for tearing up when talking about her mom. You can feel whatever moves you about her acting, her exposure, her relationship, even how many kids she has if you really need to, but no one should judge someone else’s mourning process. Everyone’s pain in losing a parent or loved one is unique to them and how much you miss them hits you at random times. Even Angelina Jolie deserves some sympathy, doesn’t she?